What Are The First Signs Of Cheating?

Hey there, Steve here and welcome to this week’s private eye post where we’ll discuss the first signs of cheating.

When people cheat, there’s a natural evolution of cheating phases they pass through.

The length of each of these cheating phases varies significantly based on the cheater’s emotional investment in their current relationship.

For example, a cheater in a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship that’s only been going a few weeks is going to be different than long-term relationships and marriages.

Also, there’s the difference between men and women.

Let’s take a look at these cheating phases and how they differ, so you’re able to spot the signs your partner has begun cheating on you.

Disclaimer: This information is for general educational purposes only and may not apply to all situations — everyone is unique after all. For help with an individual situation, please contact us —the first call is free, and we may just be able to put your mind at rest!


First Signs Of Cheating In New Relationships

For there to be a chance of cheating, there has to be a spark between the cheater and the object of their fling.

And if the cheating has any kind of build-up, there’s going to be some grooming and pruning by both parties.

For new relationships, this is going to be happening anyway, as you’re both probably still in the new “honeymoon phase.”

This means you’re not going to be able to spot this sign very easily.

Instead, you’re going to need to inspect the times you’re not together.

If there’s a pattern in the days and times you see each other, try and mix up your routine. Should your partner be inflexible on the adjustments, you’ll naturally want to know why.

You can ask questions in natural “relationship development” ways, and if there’s not a good reason for the inflexibility, your new partner may just be playing the field.


First Signs Of Cheating In Long-term Relationships And Marriages


Potential Cheating Opportunities

Before we get into what the first cheating phase looks like for a cheater in a long-term relationship, let’s first talk about potential cheating opportunities.

Potential cheating opportunities must exist for there to be a chance of cheating occurring.

Many cheats start long-term affairs at work, where some of the initial barriers are broken down. Of course, cheating opportunities are also available on night’s out or trips away when you’re not together. Both men and women cheat with someone in the workplace, although men are much more likely to do so. Surprisingly, many women cheat with a neighbour.


A Note On One-Night Stands

Although it happens, random one-night stands are not typically the type of cheating that cheater’s do the first time they cheat. We see this type of cheating more frequently in people who have been known to cheat before.


The First Cheating Phase

The first cheating phase then is usually sparked by some recognition of mutual interest between the cheater and someone they already know.

This phase can last quite some time while each party “feels the other one out.” If it’s a case of cheating with an ex, the cheating can be instant, but you’ll still see the signs of cheating common in the first phase.

First Signs Of Cheating To Look For

So, the first signs of cheating are often changes in appearance and behaviour.

Personal grooming is increased. The cheater will clothe in ways which look good or buy new clothes. A new haircut or hair colour.

Along with these physical changes, you’ll also see a “spring in their step.”

The cheater is likely to have felt things with your relationship weren’t good before they were receptive to cheating. So, if they’ve seemed generally down but now they’re walking in the clouds, something must’ve changed.

Often, the build-up includes a lot of messaging. Has your partner become precious about their phone? Are they using it a lot more than usual? Cheating is a very real possibility.

Sometimes the cheater will talk about the object of their desires to deflect your suspicions. But once they cross the line and begin to cheat, they will no longer mention the person.



If you see the first signs of cheating and you’re in a new relationship, it might just be the normal crossover between relationships and nothing to get overly worried about. Perhaps ensure you’ve had the “exclusivity chat”?

If you see the first signs of cheating and you’re in a long-term relationship, it might not be too late to put some effort into your relationship and stopping things before they get too far.

If you need help to discover the truth, you can hire us to find out for you.

Follow us on Facebook for more information on the first signs of cheating, and how to get help if you think you need to.


Until next week,