Look At Me! How To Detect “Lies In The Eyes” Of Your Cheating Wife Or Girlfriend

Hey there, Steve here and welcome to this week’s private eye post. This week, we’ll be taking a look at how eye behaviour in women can show you if she’s up to no good.

Whenever we’re carrying out surveillance, we look for more than the words and actions of the subject. We always aim to observe someone’s baseline behaviour set.

Things which make up the person. How do they speak? Fast or slow. Is their voice high pitched, or deep and bellowing. At what volume do they speak. Do they look at people when talking to them? Do they look at the floor, the wall, to the left or the right? Do they use their hands to express themselves? Do they fold their arms to relax?

Part of the ‘art’ of being a private investigator is noticing these behaviours. It helps us to figure out what’s going on much more quickly.

This observational power is critical when trying to tell if someone is lying to you, from their eyes.

Disclaimer: The information contained in this post is for general information only. Being able to read people in this way requires expert training and experience. You shouldn’t expect to be able to detect a lie in someone’s eye because you read this post. Indeed, you’re more likely to get it wrong than right. For help with an individual situation, please contact us, or use the live chat feature on this page.

#1 Flatliners

I always call this ‘Flatliners’ and what I mean is getting a good baseline of how someone’s eyes move.  You want to get good baselines for as many different situations that you can. Nowadays this is usually an easy task. Most people have plenty of photos and videos of their partners. So, you can study your partner’s behaviour at your leisure from your smartphone. In the following points, we’ll take a look at the typical behaviour changes displayed by most people. Bear in mind, some of these behaviours can be slight, or happen ‘in the blink of an eye.’  You may have to slow down the speed of recorded material to be able to see them.

#2 No Staring Competition Here – But At Least Look At Me, Goddamit.

I’ll forgive any confusion you may feel if you search Google on this subject. Some articles highlight that if someone stares at you, they’re likely to be lying. Others say that if someone is looking away from you, then they’re lying.

What’s the truth?

Well, it’s actually both.

It’s easy to understand why, and then apply to your situation.

Most people’s eyes move when they access their memory. So, a behaviour baseline for a typical person is they’ll look at you while they’re in conversation with you. But they’ll glance away from time-to-time to access the memories they need.

This means it’s unnatural for someone to stare at your eyes, the whole time they’re talking to you. (It’s not impossible though!)

For most people telling a lie is an uncomfortable thing to do. An act which makes them squirm more when they’re lying to a loved one, such as their partner. It can be so unsettling, that they can’t look at the person they’re lying to.

Is your girl spending 90% of the time looking away from you during a conversation? Is that her usual behaviour? If not, it means she’s uncomfortable, and that could be because she’s telling you porkies.

#3 What You Looking At?

Where people look when they talk to you can signify what’s happening inside their mind. People’s eyes move to the left when accessing a memory, and to the right when their brain is getting creative. This behaviour reverses for left-handed people. The reason you need to get a baseline first is lots of people are born left-handed. Their parents trained them to write with their right-hand when they were children.

#4 Dilation Deflation

People often ask me, “Do someone’s pupils dilate when they’re lying?”

The answer is yes.

But someone’s pupils also dilate when they find someone attractive and when they move from light to dark. The eyes are sensitive, so the difference between the light and dark doesn’t have to be much for dilation to happen.

So, while the CIA measure pupil dilation to detect a lie, it’s hard to do with any accuracy.

#5 Muscle Twitches

With the focus on the eyes, it’s easy to ignore what’s going on around them, and it’s here you may find a significant behaviour. Some people’s eyebrow, or muscles immediately under the eye, twitch when they’re lying. Twitches like these are unconscious and uncontrollable. It makes them accurate lie predictors.


There are plenty of signs of discomfort people display when they’re lying. Eye behaviour can be a reliable indicator of this discomfort. But of course, only to the ‘trained eye.’

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Until next week,